I recently got back the yoga videos for the Inner MAP Project's 6-week group curriculum, and it is interesting to see yourself on video. Not my favorite thing, let's just say! My inner voice was going crazy with critiques, things to change, improvements for the next round, etc. But then I began to notice what I was saying to myself. I never would have said those things to a friend or loved one. I would have congratulated them on their hard work and offered support. Yet here I was, beating myself up for my weird facial expression, stumbling over my words, and all the other things that make me HUMAN. Why is it that we are our own worst judge? Why is it so hard to be KIND to ourselves? Instead of continuing to say "What was I thinking?" about parts of the video that I didn't like, I began to ask myself "What was I thinking?" at that moment in time. Was I being kind to myself or tearing myself down? Was I focusing on the things I did well? Where could I be more compassionate in my thoughts and actions towards myself? I have started to try to notice when my inner voice becomes my inner bully, and have started trying to change how I speak to myself. After all, I am stuck with myself for the long haul so I might as well be a good friend!
